What to Name it?

The man-woman relationship as I know it (Observed from seeing, listening and growing up watching my parents go about their lives) was so fine, filled with warmth, a bond that symbolized the coming together of two human beings, two souls, equals and none over powering or dominating the other. Given this background, where I was raised to believe that we were all humans who happened to be born as male and female, I always do and react to things, incidents, situations, customs and rights, wrongs, etc on purely humane basis.

The world around us is so narrow minded and shameless that it goes about stereotyping or labeling almost everything and anything as male thing and female thing, even the food we consume is differentiated as preferred by male and female.

Why almost every time asking for respect, dignity and equality in a relationship is thrashed as being arrogant and feminist? (Signifies not upholding the rules of the patriarchal society – read it family, blood mates, friends etc) I am appalled to see people from so called liberated and broad minded upbringing completely turn tables –Ah how can they not turn tables – Male Ego!!!!! Only a man can have an ego- to be nurtured, fed, and massaged at anytime, every time, many times and always.

Why is it that every problem with in a man-woman relationship always scanned and magnified through a lens called a man’s world? A man in all of his relationships like that of a son, a brother, a friend, a husband and a father, a co-worker etc expects that problems be looked at from a MAN’S point of view. Are women incapable of making decisions, why should they conform to the inhuman rules, rituals and customs as laid down by the society. Then I ask what education is all about and not? Why this acquired knowledge and experience not utilized in reforming the society. Why do they look at a woman as a dependent being? This factor is driven into all situations, circumstances and instances in the life. A woman cannot be an independent being, nor exist as a normal human being.

Now quarter of a century on the earth, I am at point in my life, where many incidents in the recent past have hurt this very principle of our lives.

It sounds like this:
Hey you woman, cracks appear, can’t you see, set it right.
Hey you woman, give in, submit, adhere; only you have to do it.
Hey you woman, for you are what you are only if the men in our lives feel right.
Hey you woman, no question of lifting your head high, bow down, surrender.
Hey you woman, for your giver, caretaker, all encompassing symbol of goodness, you cannot but conform to keep at it.
Hey you woman, speak up, but not so loud that the cracks seem so loud and clear
Hey you woman, speak down and save the face, not of yours and not ours but of others.
Hey you woman, bite your teeth, dig your feet deep, footloose is not for you.
Hey you woman, embrace, swallow the bitterness as it is for you to take.
Hey you woman, at the end of the night you are alone.
This is how I hear it:
Hey you woman, your father, mother, brother, sister, blood mates and all of us are mere onlookers.
Hey you woman, Can you not conform, can you not adhere, can you not give, not care.
Hey you woman, hold fast to your inner self, you can live, you can shout, you can cry.
Hey you woman, for you are not alone, a few dots of life here and there.
Hey you woman, lift your head high, look up, you will find me or someone or just anyone.
Hey you woman, walk in and out, take control.
Hey you woman, footloose, unbounded lives, you as your own master is all for you to take.
Hey you woman, pronounce, denounce, release, reveal, revel and breathe.
Hey you woman, does this all sound like a perfect human tale.
Hey you woman, this all for you and for the mankind.
Hey you woman, hey you woman, live it now, see it now.

Every cell in my body pains aches and bleeds in anger, frustration and in many more ways. In ways that could have been undone, with small steps taken by many mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, friends, husbands and scores of others. It pierces right through my heart.

Ye all the educated, informed souls and all of them between these two states, leave your fattened cushions behind, raise, stand up, and look in the eye, say it right and say it now, do not smudge the reality. Nothing can be right and there cannot be a resolve if it’s a cover up, a cosmetic effort, masking of the truth, and selling your soul to something which is glaringly flawed. Six feet under, we are all one with the same, in the name of god.